Being single has always had a bit of a negative reputation. Many of us believe that we can never truly be happy without a significant other. So many movies and TV shows focus on finding love, and so many articles are written about attracting a soul mate that you would be forgiven for thinking it’s the only goal you could ever have in life. And particularly after a breakup, it can feel as though being single is the ultimate low point. But friend, I am here to tell you that being single can be amazing. Trust me when I say that you can learn how to love being single and really enjoy this season in your life.
If you keep these tips in mind, I truly believe that you can reach that happiness in your own season of singleness.
Learn What You Really Want from Life
Being on your own is the best time to figure out what makes you who you are and what you want out of life. This is your time to experiment, to identify your values, and to determine what actually makes you happy, without a significant other to influence those things.
Try new things. Go new places. Start new hobbies, or pick up old ones again. Do you love them? If so, that’s great – you’ve discovered something new about yourself! And if not, you have zero obligation to ever do that thing or go to that place again because this time of your life is all about you.
Doing these things on your own will allow you to discover what’s important to you and what you want more of in your life.
Say “Yes” as Often as You Can
Since this is your time to experiment, I recommend allowing yourself to be open to new opportunities and saying “yes” as often as you can. Especially if it takes you out of your comfort zone. You’ll be amazed at how much you’ll grow as a person by getting out there and how many doors might open for you by just being open to them.
And if you say yes to something and it turns out to be not your thing, the beauty of figuring out who you are and what you enjoy is that you don’t have to do it again. But there’s a good chance you’ll find a lot of things that you do enjoy, too.
Do What You Want – Whenever You Want
One thing I love about being single? My schedule is completely my own.
When you’re in a relationship, you have to consider what someone else wants to do, what plans they may have made for the two of you, and how your actions are going to affect the relationship that you have. If you decide to head out of town for the weekend on a whim, your partner probably won’t be too pleased. If you’re late getting home from work because you decided to stop for drinks, someone might be waiting impatiently.
But when you’re single? You set the rules. You decide what you want to do and when you’re going to do it. You have the freedom to be spontaneous and go on that impromptu road trip. You can go out for those drinks and end up dancing all night if that’s what makes you happy. Or you can stay home and watch movies. It’s entirely up to you, and that is such a freeing, wonderful thing.
Invest in Yourself
Take the freedom and time that you have now to work on yourself and grow into the kind of person that you admire. There are so many ways to do this – you could take a course, or an entire degree; you could volunteer somewhere; you could commit to exercising more, or trying a new kind of exercise; you could start or join a club for something you either love or want to learn about. Anything that is going to help you grow as a person is a great use of your time.
You have the most free time when you’re single, so use it in a way you’ll be proud of. You’ll never regret using this time to invest in yourself and becoming who you want to be.
Don’t Waste Time on Temporary People
Your time is one of the most valuable things that you have – you can never get it back. Why devote any of your time to someone who isn’t going to be in your life long-term when you could be using it on the person who matters most? (That’s you, by the way.)
This doesn’t mean you can’t go on dates or make new friends. In fact, that’s part of the fun of being single! But please do not spend any time pining over someone you lost or someone who does not return your feelings. And definitely don’t spend your time chasing anybody or begging your ex to come back.
Instead, spend your time with friends and family who care about you and who will remain in your life. And spend your time on you – it will never be wasted then.
This is something I mention in many of my posts, but it’s because it’s such an important part of being happy. Learning to love being single is basically learning to love who you are and the life you’ve made for yourself. And you, friend, are so very deserving of love, regardless of whether you’re in a relationship or single. Your value is not tied to your relationships with others. It rests with you and you alone. You are a unique person with your own amazing qualities, and you are worthy of your own love.
If you remember these tips, you’ll find yourself loving the single life in no time. Of course none of this is to say that you need to love being single forever. If love is what you want, then it’ll come one day. But for now, take advantage of the freedom you have, the opportunities that come your way, and the chance to just enjoy being you, because you’re amazing.